Book Review: How to Win Friends & Influence People

One of the most transformative book for new professionals:

How to Win Friends & Influence People

Written in 1935 by Dale Carnegie, this book will change the way you interact with others both professionally and personally. The title says it all.

Three Principals

  1. Be nice
  2. Find out what they want
  3. Help them get what they want

Six Ways to Make People Like You

  1. Become genuinely interested in other people
  2. Smile – a smile helps show people you like them
  3. Learn people’s names – “a person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language”
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.  Pay exclusive attention to the person speaking to you.
  5. Talk in a way that interests others
  6. Make others feel important

12 Techniques to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

  1. The only way to win an argument is to avoid it
  2. Respect other’s opinions
  3. Admit when you are wrong
  4. Begin in a friendly way, even when angry
  5. Get the other person to say “yes” in the beginning – begin with issues where there is agreement
  6. When dealing with complaints, let your clients do the talking
  7. Seek cooperation
  8. See thing’s from their point of view
  9. Sympathize with what the other person thinks or wants
  10. Appeal to their higher aspirations and nobler motives
  11. Express your ideas in a dramatic way
  12. Use a challenge to motivate others

Other wisdom

  • Try to never criticize, condemn or complain
  • If you must discuss a fault or concern with someone, begin with sincere praise and honest appreciation
  • If someone makes a mistake, raise awareness of their mistake indirectly
  • Before critiquing a person, reveal your own mistakes first
  • Never put someone in a position to lose face
  • Give improving employees praise, no matter how slight their progress
  • Make other people feel happy about trying out your suggestions.

Book link: How to Win Friends & Influence People

Additional reading How to: Win Friends & Influence People (quotes)

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